Doh!

My mother emailed me this morning after reading about Southern Dish. I'm tickled (or terrified) that she reads my blog, but I guess she knew she was going to be in it, so that might have been a factor. Actually, she likes my blog, although she has suggested I clean up my language and my history. Hell, you can't please every damn person that reads your damn blog, can you*? Anyhow, this is what she had to say:

You forgot the paprika, and I do always add onion, Miss Super Fancy Pants. And I definitely don't have a breathy voice -- a growl, maybe. Hope your trip was not too long. Love, Mother

Oops! I did forget the paprika. So sprinkle some on top of Southern Dish before cooking. And my trip wasn't any longer than it had to be, but it was too long. Thank you for asking. For those of you who don't know, I'm working on my application for Mother of the Year, so I'll have another trophy to display next to the one for Meanest Mommy Ever. My oldest son's class left for their yearly trip yesterday morning, to an island two hours away. He had a recording session for his choir last night that he didn't want to miss, so I offered to drive him to the island after choir, at 8 pm. Two and half hours there and two and a half back. When I dropped him off, I didn't even get out of the car to go to the bathroom. I figured I'd be able to stay awake on the drive if I was also struggling to control my bladder. I'm no love-sick astronaut. It worked and I got home just before one in the morning. I'm exhausted and I can't stop eating these chocolate covered almonds from Trader Joe's, but other than that I'm okay. Thank you for asking. And I'll take my new trophy any time now. I hope it's big and flashy**.

Oh, and, Mom? I said "breezy" not "breathy." And you did attempt a breezy tone. So there. And I'm sure you do always add onion. And is there a trophy for Miss Super Fancy Pants? I bet there is and I bet it is very sparkly! I think I need a bigger trophy case.

She sent me another email, just two minutes later.

And I use the low fat small curd cottage cheese, and I don't think I even put it into my mini-food processor last time. Only when I have chunky cottage cheese do I do that. I did mean cheddar (there are other kinds$) -- EXTRA sharp.

I probably blocked out the "low fat," because I like fat. For the record, Mom likes low fat stuff and her Southern Dish is excellent, so it must work. I'm glad to hear the food processor is unnecessary, because I love skipping steps! I think that dollar sign is a typo, but it might be a comment on the fact that Mom thinks I spend too much on food. But I love food! I agree with her suggestion of Extra Sharp cheese; that would definitely add something to Southern Dish.

Namasté, y'all!

* Although I refuse to clean up my language here - this blog is for grownups, dammit! - she might have a point. Baby J has started saying something that sounds suspiciously like "sh*t" every time he drops something. He must have picked it up from those harlots at the church nursery. Crap!

** That's what she said.