There are a few things wrong with my city, but only three that infuriate me.

1. Why on earth can I not buy Kiehl's in this town? Three other cities in my state have it. Why. Not. Mine! Damnit! I must admit, though, that it's kind of nice, because when my dear husband goes to one of those cities for work, it's perfectly reasonable for me to ask him to pick up a few things. Kind of like having a personal assistant. Hooray! These are the things I can't live without:

• Amino Acid Shampoo. Oooohhh. Smells like coconut and makes my hair purty!
• Lip Balm #1. Duh. In the jar, please, not the tube. I like the tinted ones in the tube for the beach.
  
• This stuff. Now that I'm old, I get dry patches of skin. This stuff rocks.
• Hair Creme with Silk Groom. Don't understand it, but when my hair looks gross, this stuff magically transforms it.

2. Why don't any of the bartenders here know how to make a Mendelssohn? This is the best last drink of the night ever. Bailey's Irish Cream, over ice, with a splash of club soda. It's like Yoo-hoo for grown-ups. In fact, I might try to turn it into a brunch drink. Mendelssohns are the new Mimosas. You heard it here first.

3. As far as I know, I can't get Chie Mihara shoes here. I can get them in Charleston, at Worthwhile, an absolutely brilliant store, but not here. Why not? Wah! To make me feel better, perhaps you would like to buy me these or these. Perhaps. Or maybe these? I wear a 38. Just sayin'.

I know there are many other problems in my town and it might seem that I'm being glib, but I'm all about glib, and I'm far too shy to get into discussions about the real problems, m'kay? If we could fix the aforementioned three, I might be willing to tackle the others.

Namsté, y'all.